


they will see my strength (in this love i've found)

by glowinghorizons



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Met on the Ark Station (The 100), F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-15
Updated: 2016-12-15
Packaged: 2018-09-08 15:59:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8851177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glowinghorizons/pseuds/glowinghorizons
Summary: “If you’re married they won’t let you go alone.”

  The silence is deafening. Bellamy braces himself for the slap he knows is going to come his way any second, but it never happens.

  “You--” she sounds breathless. “You don’t even know me.”

  Bellamy shrugs. “Look. I-- this is crazy. I know. I just know that I can’t let my sister go to the ground without me.” 
OR, Clarke finds out she's being sent to the Ground only days after her Dad dies. Bellamy is determined to go to the Ground with his sister. They need to fool everyone to make it work.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Merry Christmas, Alessa! You wanted a two parter - an Ark AU, and arranged marriage or fake dating. I tried to work as much in from your prompts as I could! Hope you like it.
> 
> Note: Things are basically the same as canon. Clarke’s dad is still executed, as is Bellamy’s Mom. Lyrics for the title and inset are from “Hard Love” by Needtobreathe.

_Trading punches with the heart of darkness_

_Going to blows with your fear incarnate_

_Never gone until it's stripped away_

_A part of you has gotta die today_

Clarke wakes up 4 days after her Dad dies with a knot in her stomach and her head aching. She doesn’t know how to do this -- she doesn’t know how to grieve, or how to lose someone. She’s never had to go through this before.

“Clarke?” Her Mom knocks. “Someone’s here to see you.”

“I don’t want to see anyone right now.” Clarke wills her voice to be somewhat civil. She hasn’t spoken more than few words to Abby Griffin since Jake Griffin was floated, especially now that she knows her mother practically turned him in.

“You should get up. I made breakfast. I have to go to the clinic.” 

Clarke takes a little vindication in how tired her mom seems, but doesn’t pause for any more thoughts of sympathy. She hears a sigh, and then retreating footsteps, before the sounds of someone talking at the front door. Clarke rolls over, ignoring them, and shuts her eyes tight, trying to will herself to go back to sleep.

“Clarke?” 

Clarke sits up, eyes wide. _Nathan_. 

“Miller?” She asks, and the door to her bedroom creaks open. 

“Your Mom let me in.” He comes in, but hesitates before sitting down on the edge of the bed. “I wanted to check on you.”

Clarke stares at him. “I don’t understand. You were in the Skybox.” 

Clarke and Nathan grew up together, and with Wells, they were like the three musketeers, until Nathan started hanging around with a different crowd of friends. Clarke didn’t hold it against him, but she didn’t expect to see him here, either.

“They had my trial early. I think my Dad pushed for it.” 

“And?” Clarke sits up fully now, turning to face him, pushing her unruly hair out of her eyes. 

“Probation, for now.” He smiles ruefully. “Not taking a space walk anytime soon, though.” 

“Have you seen Wells yet?” She asks, and he shakes his head, frowning.

“No. I-- my Dad told me about yours when I got out. I’m sorry, Clarke.” 

Clarke feels her throat tighten. “Yeah. Me too.”

.

.

Later, Clarke manages to let Wells and Miller convince her to come with them to the commissary for lunch, even though she protests the entire way. The minute she walks in, people are whispering, and she hates it. 

“They’re probably talking about me, anyway.” Miller says, his chest puffing out, and Clarke rolls her eyes. 

They take a seat at a nearby table and Clarke pushes the food around on her plate as she pretends that her friends aren’t doing everything they can to act like things are normal. She wonders if she’s ever going to feel normal ever again. 

“Bellamy, hey!” Miller says, waving over a tall guy with curly hair.

He looks uncomfortable, and Clarke wonders where she’s seen him before. He seems familiar, but she doesn’t recognize the name. 

“Bellamy and I were in the cadet program together.” Miller explains, and Wells smiles as he makes introductions, realizing that Clarke isn’t going to say anything.

“You’re Abby Griffin’s daughter.” Bellamy says. It’s not a question.

Clarke raises an eyebrow in acknowledgement. 

“I heard about your Dad.”

“Join the club.” Clarke mutters, looking back down at her plate. 

Bellamy clenches his jaw. “Sorry.” 

“Everyone’s sorry!” Clarke blurts, her voice louder than she intended. “My dad is _dead_ and everyone is so sorry, like I’m supposed to find some relief in that!” 

“Clarke--” Wells tries to interrupt, but it’s like she can’t stop herself.

“Look, I don’t know you. You don’t know me. You don’t need to be _sorry_.” She’s out of her seat before she knows what she’s doing, leaving everyone staring after her. 

She barely makes it into the hallway before she collapses, tears springing to her eyes. She’s so _tired_. She doesn’t want to see her Mom, she doesn’t want to hear from everyone about how sorry they are, and she doesn’t want to live in a world where her Dad doesn’t exist anymore. 

Picking herself up off the floor, she heads back to the apartment, hoping no one follows her. 

.

.

Bellamy watches Clarke Griffin storm out of the commissary, and feels a pang of guilt. 

“I should go--” Wells starts, but Bellamy shakes his head. 

“Take it from someone who knows, that’s the last thing she wants you to do right now.” He swallows hard, thinking of the look on his Mom’s face right before she was ejected out into space, the dark color of her eyes fading into the background with the rest of her. 

He was wary, when he saw Nathan Miller and came to sit with them. Since he became a janitor, he’s become used to isolation. He’s never had many friends - he couldn’t, not with Octavia hiding in their apartment -- and still isn’t sure how to handle it when people he knew from guard training try to talk to him now. 

Miller is different, though. He’s from Alpha station but he doesn’t act like it. They hit it off straight away in training, and when Bellamy got demoted, Miller was sent to the Skybox around the same time. 

“She’ll be okay.” Miller says, though he sounds like he’s trying to convince himself, too. “Her Dad… they were close. Plus… rumors are that her Mom turned her Dad in. She knows, or at least she’s trying to figure it out.” 

Wells winces. “This is all so messed up.” 

Bellamy watches as Marcus Kane comes into the commissary, posting fliers around on the corkboards about a mandatory broadcast happening later that night. “Looks like it’s only going to get worse.” He mutters, suddenly not hungry anymore. 

.

.

That night, Clarke watches the broadcast with her Mom, who is sitting stiff in her seat, causing Clarke to be immediately on edge. This is how she looked the morning Jake was arrested. Clarke doesn’t think she’ll ever forget any detail of that day, no matter how small.

Chancellor Jaha’s voice speaks loudly over the tinny speakers in their apartment. _“Citizens of The Ark, tonight I am announcing a new initiative that is going to be the next phase of all our lives. Massive innovations have gone on to make this possible. We need to look to the future of all our citizens, and their children. To give them the best life possible, we’ve decided to finally venture to the Ground.”_

Clarke gasps, but keeps watching, riveted. 

_“There are a select few that have been chosen to go first, along with some citizens currently occupying the Skybox. Those who have been chosen are the following: Jacapo Sinclair. Raven Reyes. Nathan Miller. David Miller.”_

Clarke feels like her heart is going to beat out of her chest as she listens to the list of names, her heart stopping when Nathan’s is read. 

_“Clarke Griffin.”_ Clarke doesn’t even hear the rest of the names, or the list of people from the Skybox. Her mind is spinning.

She must make a noise, because her mother turns to look at her, tears in her eyes. Clarke’s eyes meet hers, and she knows she must look shell-shocked. “Did you know about this?” 

Abby doesn’t say anything, and Clarke feels a scream tearing its way out of her throat. She stifles it the best she can, digging her nails into her own palm as hard as she can without drawing blood. 

“I--” Clarke gasps, wondering if she’s going to hyperventilate. “I can’t believe this.” 

“Clarke, please. This is a chance for a new start. A new life.” 

“They didn’t read your name, Mom. Why didn’t they read your name?!” 

“Clarke, I have to stay here, with the council. You’re going to the _ground_ , baby. This is going to be a remarkable achievement--”

“I don’t care about any of that!” Clarke snaps. “How do we even know that the Ground is ready for people again?”

“We’ve done research--” 

“You’re sending me to the Ground, _alone_. Why? Is it so I don’t tell everyone what I know?”

“That’s not--”

“The Ark is running out of air. That’s why you’re sending us.” 

“Be reasonable, Clarke.” 

“No!” Clarke lets a few tears spill over. “You know what? Fine. Put me on the first shuttle. I don’t care. Getting an entire planet away from you and what you’ve done can’t happen fast enough.” 

Abby looks as if she’s been slapped, and Clarke feels bad immediately, despite the hot anger still coursing through her veins. 

“I have to get some air.” Clarke says, and is out the door before she can hear another word from her mother.

.

.

.

Bellamy barely sleeps that night. He can only hear that name, over and over in his head. _Octavia Blake. Octavia Blake. Octavia Blake_. 

He knew something like this would happen, because his entire life has been a total disaster. He doesn’t know what to do with himself, so he tries to stay busy the next day. He goes about his rounds, but stops when he gets to engineering, wondering if he’s going to get slapped for what he’s about to do.

“Hey, Raven.” He says quietly so he doesn’t startle her. He and Raven have known each other since they were kids. “I need to talk to you.”

She’s sitting at the table in her workstation, her head in her hands. “I’m a little preoccupied right now, Bellamy.” 

He sighs. “I know. That’s why I wanted to talk to you.” 

“Let me guess. You’ve been in love with me forever and you can’t bear to let me travel to a radiation-soaked planet without telling me.” Her eyes are hard, her words cold. 

“I didn’t mean--” 

“I can’t go to the Ground, Bellamy. They’re not letting all the people in lockup go -- only a select few. How is this fair? I’ve already been separated from everyone I’ve ever loved my entire life, and now I have to leave Finn here on this godforsaken ship.” 

“Octavia is going to the ground.” Bellamy says. “I have to get on that ship.” 

Raven shakes her head. “What do you want me to do about it? Go beg the Chancellor.” 

“Raven--” 

“I swear to God, Bellamy, if you came here to make some kind of dumbass plan to swap places with me, I’m going to kick your ass. You don’t want to go to the ground.”

“What difference does it make if I go, or if you go? Like you said, your family is here.” 

“They’ll never agree to it.” 

“I’ll make them.” Bellamy says, clenching his jaw. Raven doesn’t say anything else, and Bellamy doesn’t push her. “I’ll come by later. We’ll figure it out.” 

He leaves, trying to remember the last time he did something this batshit crazy. “God dammit.” He mutters to himself, raking his hands through his hair. He’s halfway back to his apartment before he quite literally runs into someone, his hands coming up instinctively to catch them. “Sorry--” The word is out of his mouth before the person wrenches themselves out of his grip, and he pauses, recognizing the blonde hair. “Clarke?” 

“Bellamy. Sorry. I wasn’t watching where I was going.” 

He frowns. “What are you doing here?” 

She shrugs. “I was just-- I was walking.” 

He narrows his eyes at her in suspicion. “All the way in Factory Station?” 

“What are you -- in the Guard?” She snaps, and he sucks in a breath in surprise.

“Not anymore.” He mutters, and she looks up at him with red-rimmed eyes. “I was kicked out after they found out about my secret sister.” _Cut right to the chase, why don’t you_. “You’re not the only one who has problems right now, Princess.” He says, and it comes out harsher than he means it to. He doesn’t want to yell at her, not really, but he can’t think straight knowing his sister is going to be sent to the ground. 

“I never said--” Clarke says, indignantly, and Bellamy shakes his head. 

“No, I know. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way. I just meant--” he sighs, “-- I just meant that you’re not alone right now. That’s all.” 

Clarke frowns. “They’re sending me to the ground.” 

“I heard.” 

“My Mom is sending me. She knew. She put me on the list.” 

“How do you--”

“I just know, okay.” 

Bellamy stares at her, and the gears start turning in his head. He thinks, for the second time that day, that what he’s about to suggest is probably going to get him punched, but he has to try. “You don’t have to go by yourself.” 

“What are you talking about? I mean, Nathan is going, but he has his Dad, and I’m--”

“If you’re married they won’t let you go alone.” 

The silence is deafening. Bellamy braces himself for the slap he knows is going to come his way any second, but it never happens. 

“You--” she sounds breathless. “You don’t even know me.” 

Bellamy shrugs. “Look. I-- this is crazy. I know. I just know that I can’t let my sister go to the ground without me.” 

“How do you even know that will work?” 

“They said during the broadcast that anyone who’s selected to go that’s married can bring their partner. I… I know this is crazy. I don’t-- I don’t mean to put this on you, but I can’t--”

“Just... “ she interrupts him. “Just let me think.” 

He looks at her, _really_ looks at her for the first time, and all he sees is someone who is just as broken as he is, and who needs someone. He admires her, he really does, because whatever he thought of her before - a girl from Alpha who probably never wanted for anything her entire life -- he knows what’s happened to her recently has changed her. 

“If you need time to think about it… I understand. I just-- I have to get to the ground. I know you’re hurting right now and I know this isn’t fair, and we’re _strangers_ , but--”

“Just… just give me a day. I’ll think about it and I’ll find you.” 

Bellamy watches her walk away from him and wonders if he’s just made a huge mistake, or if something is finally, _finally_ going to go his way.

.

.

.

Clarke picks at her dinner again. She can’t stop thinking about the absolutely ridiculous thing Bellamy Blake proposed, and she doesn’t know what to do.

He’s desperate, she knows that. She also knows that right now she would do just about anything to run away from her problems, but she also knows how spoiled that makes her sound. She thinks it makes her a little desperate, too, though, and wonders if this isn’t the solution she’s been looking for.

Her Dad has only been gone for a week, and she still feels so angry and so lost, and she knows that she’s grieving, and that she should take time when making a decision like this, but really all she can think about is what the look on her Mom’s face would be like when she tells her that she’s engaged to Bellamy Blake. Bellamy Blake, who hid his sister in his apartment for years, and who was demoted. 

“Clarke?” Abby’s voice interrupts Clarke’s thoughts. “I asked if you wanted to come to the medbay with me tomorrow. It would be good for you to get some extra training in before… before you go.” 

Clarke’s mind is made up.

“I can come later in the morning. I have to meet up with Bellamy, first.” 

Abby freezes, her fork in midair. “Bellamy?”

Clarke nods nonchalantly. “Yes. Bellamy Blake. I haven’t mentioned him before?” 

“I’m sure I would remember if you had.” Abby’s mouth is pulled into a tight, thin line. 

“Oh. Well, Miller introduced us awhile ago.” _Not totally a lie_. “Anyway, we’ve had plans for awhile, so I can come to the medbay after that.” 

“Clarke-- I don’t think that’s a good idea.” 

Clarke sets down her fork and looks at her mother in the eyes for the first time in days. “Why?” 

“People… people will talk, Clarke.” 

“Are you serious? I’m getting sent to Earth in a month. No one cares who I talk to.”

“Clarke--”

“I don’t want to talk about this.” Clarke stands up. “I’m going to bed.” 

.

_In the morning you gon' need an answer_

_Ain't nobody gonna change the standard_

_It's not enough to just feel the flame_

_You've gotta burn your old self away_

The next morning, Clarke sets out early to find Bellamy. She thinks Wells and Miller might kill her (and more likely, kill Bellamy) for what she’s about to do, but she’s too angry to do anything else. This way, she can help him get to his sister, and she can get back at her Mom for trying to control everything. If she’s going to go to the ground, she’s going to do it on her terms.

She finds him in Agro station, a mop in his hand and a frown on his face. Stopping before she comes into view, she watches him for a second. He seems so… so _lost_ , and she feels a moment of connection with this boy that she’s never had with anyone else. 

She comes into view fully, even though there’s a part of her that still thinks this will never work. No one’s going to believe them. “Bellamy.” She says his name softly, hoping she doesn’t startle him, but she seems to anyway.

His shoulders tense, and then relax when he recognizes her. “Clarke.” 

“I’ll do it.” 

He stares at her. “Are you sure?” She doesn’t know if she’s imagining the way his voice is a little shaky.

“Yeah. I-- I don’t want to do this alone. And I want to help you. I want to help your sister.” 

Bellamy’s face softens at the mention of his younger sister. “Octavia. Her name is Octavia.” 

Clarke smiles. This is going to work.

.

“This is the dumbest idea you’ve ever had.” Miller says bluntly, later, when Clarke visits him in the commissary. Wells is there too, a frown on his face as he watches his friends talk. “I know you’re angry with your Mom, Clarke, and I get it. Don’t you think this is taking it a little too far?” 

“She’s sending me down because the council told her to, I just know it. They don’t want me telling anyone what my Dad knew.”

“A little late for that.” Wells mutters. “How are you even going to tell her?” 

“I’m going to tell her that we’ve been seeing each other in secret, because we didn’t think our families would let us be together. After Bellamy’s Mom died, he stopped talking to me for awhile, and then when Dad was floated, we got back together.” 

“That… is almost a believable story.” Wells says, but he’s still frowning. “I don’t know why you have to get married though. Couldn’t he just be your fake boyfriend?” 

Clarke shakes her head. “They’ll never let him go down with me if they think we’re just dating. He has to either be my fiance, or we have to be married already.” 

Miller crosses his arms. “So what are you going to do if it works and he comes down with you? You’re just going to go your separate ways?” 

Clarke shrugs. “I don’t see why not.” 

Miller narrows his eyes. “This is going to be a shitshow, Clarke. Wells is better at this emotional stuff. So when you fall in love with Bellamy and need a shoulder to cry on, I’m going to say ‘I told you so’.” 

Clarke punches him lightly in the arm. “Shut up.” 

.

.

.

The first shuttle to Earth is supposed to leave in 4 weeks. Bellamy knows they don’t have much time to convince people. From what he knows, he’s still going to have to apply for both a marriage license _and_ appeal to the council to go down on the dropship with Clarke.

It’s a lot of red tape, but he’s hoping Clarke can use whatever pull she has with her mom and the council members to get through it quickly. He doesn’t want Octavia to be alone at all and doesn’t want her thinking he’s not coming down after her. _My sister, my responsibility._

Tonight is a whole different story. Tonight they’re telling Clarke’s mom about _them_ , and Bellamy’s pretty sure he’s going to sweat through his shirt before he even gets there. He’s wearing the closest thing he has to a nice shirt, and he’s still sure it’s obvious that he’s poor.

The looks he’s getting just walking through Alpha station are enough to make him want to turn around and go the other way, but the thought of Clarke waiting for him keeps him going. He doesn’t want to skimp on his end of the deal. 

When he gets to the apartment, he hesitates before knocking. He doesn’t know how much Clarke has told her Mom already, but they’ve gone over their story again and again. 

When Clarke opens the door, he pauses, seeing in her eyes immediately how nervous she is. Seeing her Mom in the background, eyeing him like a hawk, he leans down, pressing a chaste kiss to Clarke’s temple. “Calm down.” He tells her quietly. 

“Mom…” She says, letting Bellamy brush past her. Her voice is a little tremulous, and Bellamy wonders how they’re going to get through this night. “This is Bellamy Blake. Bellamy, this is my Mom, Abby Griffin.” 

“Hi, Doctor Griffin. I’ve heard a lot about you from Clarke.” Not totally untrue. It’s mostly been bad things, but he knows enough. 

“Bellamy. Please sit down. I have to say, I haven’t heard much about you from Clarke.” 

“Mom.” Clarke hisses. 

“It’s okay, Clarke.” Bellamy says, trying to get her to meet his eyes. “We’ve… we’ve been taking this slow. Keeping it quiet. Now that Clarke’s going to the ground though...” he trails off, looking at Clarke. “... I didn’t want to keep it a secret anymore.” 

“I see.” 

Dinner is awkward. There’s nothing for it. Bellamy tries everything he can think of to make small talk with Clarke’s mom, but they really don’t have much in common. He kind of has a hard time meeting her eyes, knowing that she had a hand in making the decision for his mom being floated. Clarke seems close to having a panic attack all night, too, and Bellamy is doing everything he can to calm her down before she gives away the entire thing.

When Abby clears the table, Bellamy reaches for Clarke before he can stop himself. Her hand is small and warm in his, and softer than his too. “You need to relax. You’re going to make yourself sick.” 

She looks at him with wide, panicked eyes. “She’s never going to believe us. I’m pretty sure she already hates you.” 

Bellamy snorts. “Gee, thanks.” 

“This is serious, Bellamy!” 

“Which is exactly why you need to learn how to be a better actress.” 

Abby comes back into the room, and stops short when she sees the way Bellamy are sitting - their knees touching, and Clarke’s hand still cradled in Bellamy’s larger one. “It’s getting late.” She says, leaving no room for argument. 

Bellamy pulls Clarke to her feet, and walks with her to the door, aware of Abby’s eyes on them the entire time. Clumsily, he gathers Clarke into a hug, their limbs fitting together awkwardly at first as they try to act like they do this all the time. “It’s going to be okay,” he murmurs. “Take some deep breaths and try to calm down.” 

He feels some of the tension leave her shoulders, and squeezes her hand briefly before he leaves, stopping in the corridor to take a deep breath.

This is going to work. It has to.

.

.

Two days later, Bellamy is blindsided by Abby Griffin on his usual rounds through Go-Sci, and as soon as he gets off shift, he heads off to find Clarke, fuming. 

It boiled down to _stay away from Clarke, or else_ , and Bellamy has never taken kindly to people telling him what to do. 

When he gets to his apartment, Clarke is already there, pacing. When she sees him, her eyes widen apologetically. “I’m sorry!” She exclaims, and he rolls his eyes, unlocking the door and letting her inside. 

“Tell me why I just had to listen to your Mom go on a five minute tirade about how I’m not good enough for you.” 

“I told her not to! She never listens to me, she just--”

“Clarke. She basically just told me to stay away from you. How are we supposed to tell her that we’re getting _married_? How are we even going to get a license approved if she--”

“No.” Clarke says firmly. “No, I’m going to fix this. I told you I would, and I will.” 

Bellamy sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “This is the stupidest idea.” 

“Well, it was _your_ stupid idea.” She says, trying to lighten the mood. “We just have to… we just have to be better. More convincing.” 

“If we’re going to do this in time, we need to apply for the license soon.” He runs his hands through his hair, and wonders, not for the first time, how she can seem so nervous in public about this, but be so calm about when it’s just the two of them. 

“I’ll… I’ll tell her tonight.” 

“What if she freaks out?” 

“I’ll be at the apartment. If you don’t hear from me tomorrow, it’s safe to say it’s gone badly.” Clarke smiles wryly.

“That’s not funny.” 

“I’m sorry she--” Clarke starts, looking down at her shoes. “I’m just sorry.” 

“Hey.” Bellamy moves closer to her, wondering where the sudden urge to comfort her is coming from. “We’ll figure it out. I have tomorrow off. Come find me when you talk to your Mom.” 

“I don’t mean to make this harder on you, Bellamy.” Clarke says, one hand on the door handle. “I know you’re worried about Octavia and the last thing you need is for me to mess everything up.”

“Princess, my life can’t get any more screwed up than it already is.” 

.

To say it doesn’t go well is an understatement. Bellamy wakes up in the middle of the night with a comm message from Miller, who tells him in a few words that Clarke showed up late, close to breaking down. 

Bellamy is a little embarrassed by how fast he gets to Miller’s apartment. He just worries that Clarke is freaking out and that she’s not going to go through with this. Though there’s a little voice in the back of his head that’s telling him he’s not just worried about the plan, that he’s worried about _her_. 

Bellamy knocks on the door lightly, and has to fight off the urge to push his way inside, because he can _hear_ Clarke crying. 

“She’s in here,” Nathan says. “I don’t know-- her Mom really let her have it. Look. She told me what’s going on with you guys.” 

Bellamy breathes a sigh of relief. One less person he has to lie to. “Let me talk to her. This is-- this is my fault. She doesn’t need this.” 

“Wait.” Miller grabs his arm. “I understand why you’re doing this. I also understand why Clarke agreed to this, but you need to know that Clarke is always concerned with taking care of everyone else. Her instinct tells her to put everyone first. God knows she and I have fought about it before.” 

“Miller--”

“I’m just saying, be careful. She’s loyal to a fault, almost to her own detriment.” 

Bellamy nods. “I get it. I don’t want to hurt her, Nate. I just-- I don’t even know.” 

Miller watches him warily. “Come on. Maybe you can get her to talk a little more.” 

Bellamy follows him into the living space, and sees Clarke on the couch, her head in her hands, her hair falling over her face. He feels extremely guilty when he hears her stifle a sob at the sight of him. It kind of breaks his heart a little bit. “Not the reaction I was going for, princess.”

Clarke lets out a weak laugh. “Shut up.” 

“What happened?” Bellamy crouches down in front of her. 

“I told her…” Clarke sniffs. “I told her that you were hinting that you were going to propose. She-- she didn’t react very well.” 

“Shit. I’m sorry.” 

“She said I was too young, and that I was stupid for even considering it, and--” Clarke cuts herself off, seemingly not getting enough air. Miller sits next to her and squeezes her shoulder sympathetically. “She told me my Dad would be so disappointed in me.” 

“Jesus, Clarke.” Miller breathes. 

“That’s not true, Clarke.” Bellamy says, his voice firm. “I know we still don’t know each other that well, but you’re doing this partly to help me. Seems like the kind of selfless act that anyone would be proud of.” 

She looks up at him, her blue eyes watery, and something inside of him cracks open at seeing her like this - so full of worry and trust _for him_. He reminds himself again that this is the stupidest idea he’s ever had, mostly because he doesn’t know how he’s going to make it through this without starting to care for Clarke more than he should.

.

.

.

Clarke and Bellamy are married three weeks before the first shuttle takes off. Clarke tells her mom they don’t want to wait anymore, that they want to be together before going to the ground, just in case anything goes wrong. 

Clarke thinks there’s a split-second where her mom sees this plan for what it really is, but if she does, she doesn’t say anything. Clarke has to steel herself before every interaction with her mom now, and she feels a sort of grim satisfaction when she sees the guilty look on Abby’s face. 

She and Bellamy are getting better at pretending they’re together. It worries Clarke, how easy it is to fall into routine with him. Their schedules line up for the most part, so they have lunch together, and when Kane is around, or her Mom, or their friends, he always takes care to put a hand on her lower back, or brush a kiss to her cheek in greeting.

Clarke starts to worry about what’s going to happen if they don’t pull it off, but on their wedding day, there aren’t any last minute objections. 

Clarke walks into the room with Wells on her arm, taking her Dad’s place, and Abby on her other side. Clarke is wearing the best dress they could find at the marketplace on short notice, and her hair has been pulled away from her face. 

There’s a moment when Clarke isn’t sure if Bellamy is acting or not -- his jaw falls open slightly when he sees her for the first time, and Clarke can’t pinpoint if it’s nerves or acting when his hands shake slightly as he puts a ring on her finger. 

The ceremony goes by in a blur. Clarke has to remind herself to breathe, to remind herself that she’s doing this for a reason. She’s going to the ground. She’s doing this to make sure Bellamy sees his sister again. She’s doing all of this for reasons she can be proud of. She still feels bad, though, for shackling Bellamy to her like this. She feels like she’s been nothing but fragile since the moment they met.

Before Clarke knows it, they’re back in Bellamy’s apartment, sitting side by side, in silence. 

“We really did it.” Bellamy says, his voice deep. “We’re going to the ground.” 

“Your sister is going to be so mad you got married without her around.” Clarke teases, nudging his shoulder. 

Bellamy smiles softly at her. “Probably. And hey -- your Mom didn’t look like she wanted to kill me, for two seconds today. I’m counting that as a win.” 

“Idiot.” 

.

.

.

The first dropship leaves in three days. Clarke and Bellamy have a spot, but they have no idea if Octavia is going to be on the same ship.

Bellamy knows he’s frustrated and irritated and taking it out on Clarke. They have opposite shifts this week - her at the medbay and him in sanitation -- so they haven’t seen each other much. When they’re home together, it’s nothing but stilted conversations and awkward pauses. 

“Clarke?” He calls out when he gets to the apartment that night, heading to their bedroom to change clothes. 

“Kitchen.” She says, her voice sounding muted and sad. Bellamy sighs, preparing himself for more bad news. He knows she’s anxious for their trip to the ground. Hell, he’s scared too. He has no idea what this is going to be like. He promised her she wouldn’t be alone, though, and he intends to keep that promise. 

“Hey.” He says when he comes in, reaching around her for a bottle of water on the counter. “Long day?” 

“Yeah. Have you started packing at all?” 

Bellamy shrugs. “They said one small bag each. I don’t have much.” 

“Do you think they’re going to give Octavia extra clothes? I mean, does she have anything here that I should pack for her? I don’t have much, either.” 

Bellamy is so caught off guard by Clarke wanting to do something for his sister that he freezes, staring at her. 

“Bell?” She repeats, her forehead crinkled in confusion. 

It’s the nickname that does it, Bellamy thinks dazedly, and his last thought is _fuck it_ , before he leans in and kisses her, a little harder than he means to. It’s a little desperate, and sort of feels like an end-of-the-world kiss. 

Clarke melts against him after a few seconds, much to his relief, and when she kisses him back, he doesn’t think he could stop the noise that escapes him if he wanted to. He tries to tell himself it’s just because it’s been a long time since he’s sought comfort in someone else’s touch, but he knows a part of it is because it’s _Clarke_.

When they break apart, they just kind of stare at each other for a minute, before a smile Bellamy has never seen before stretches across Clarke’s face. “I knew you just wanted to marry me because you thought I was cute.” 

Bellamy grins. “God. Shut _up_.” 

.

.

_You know the situation can't be right_

_And all you ever do is fight_

_But there's a reason that the road is long_

_It takes some time to make your courage strong_

The morning of the exodus, Bellamy is practically vibrating as they walk together to the dropship. There’s a line of people waiting to board and saying goodbye to their families, and Clarke steels herself when she sees her mother there, her face pinched tight. 

“Clarke. Bellamy. I guess it’s time.” 

“Yeah.” Clarke agrees. “I guess it is.” 

“Once you’re down there for two months and establish a living space, the council is going to follow. There are enough people going to down to help you get started.” 

Bellamy scoffs, but doesn’t say anything. 

Abby hugs Clarke, surprising her, but Clarke hugs her mother back. After they embrace, she turns to Bellamy, and Clarke winces, preparing for the worst. 

“Take care of her.” Abby says, and Bellamy blinks at her.

“You don’t have to worry about that.” 

After, they gather their things and move forward in the line, waiting until they get to the front. Bellamy reads their names to the bored-looking guardsman, who furrows his brow. “I have a spot for Clarke Griffin, but not Bellamy Blake. No Clarke Blake, either.” 

“She kept her last name. We’re married. We’re going together.” 

“I don’t know what to tell you.” The man says, and Clarke feels dread pool in her stomach. “I only have a spot for Clarke Griffin. Nothing for a Bellamy Blake.” 

“I--” Clarke turns to Bellamy, her eyes widening. “This isn’t right. We’re supposed to--” 

“It’s okay.” Bellamy tells her, his hand finding hers and squeezing. “I’ll get it figured out.” He says before he leaves, searching for someone to figure this out. 

“Clarke? You’ve got to get on, takeoff is soon.” Miller says, passing by her with his Dad. 

“They-- something’s wrong. They don’t have a spot for Bellamy.” 

Miller frowns. “That’s not--” He stops when Bellamy comes back, his face grim. 

“They put me on the next launch.” 

“What?” Clarke asks, her voice embarrassingly high. “No, that’s not right. We’re supposed to go together. Your sister…” she trails off, watching the way Bellamy is looking at her, like he’s trying to remember what she looks like. 

“Go with Miller, Clarke.” 

“That’s not the deal, Bellamy.” 

He smiles sadly at her. “I’ll see you in two months.” 

“That’s--” Clarke pulls at her hair. “That’s too _long_!” 

Bellamy leans in and presses a kiss to her hair, ignoring Miller’s raised eyebrow. “If you find Octavia, tell her I’m coming. I’ll see you soon, Clarke.” 

“No. No, this isn’t right. Bellamy, you promised!” Clarke feels her panic start to set in. She knows she’s causing a scene, but she can’t help it. 

This started out as a way to help Bellamy, to get away from the anger and oppression she feels from her Mom, to start over. Now… now none of that is happening, not the way it’s supposed to. She and Bellamy have just become… whatever they are to each other now. She doesn’t want to lose that. She doesn’t want to lose _him_. 

“Clarke, we have to go.” Miller says, tugging at her elbow lightly. 

“Bellamy--” 

“You’re going to be fine, Clarke. I promise. I’ll see you soon.” Bellamy says, hugging her tightly before he’s turning around, walking away until the only thing Clarke can see is the broad line of his shoulders before her vision blurs, and she lets the first tear fall. 

.

.

.

_2 months later_

Bellamy feels like he can’t breathe. The dropship hurtles through space, and he grits his teeth against the almost unbearable pressure he feels from all angles. 

Octavia is there, right next to him, and he counts his lucky stars that he didn’t have to wait any longer to see her. At least if this goes wrong they’ll go down together, he thinks grimly. 

He shuts his eyes tight against the blinding light as they enter the atmosphere, and behind his closed eyelids, all he sees is Clarke. He’s missed her, more than he thought he would. He misses the way she hums when she’s in the shower, and the way she scrunches her nose when she’s confused about something. 

He hopes she’s okay. He hopes that Miller is there taking care of her, and keeping her from doing anything stupid. He hopes they land in the right place, that it doesn’t take them too long to find each other again, because it turns out the whole thing was for nothing.

They didn’t go to the ground together. Hell, she didn’t even really help him reunite with his sister. She was right about one thing, though. The first thing Octavia found out was that he got married, and she’s barely said a word to him since, right up until the launch. 

When they hit the ground, the impact rattles his skull so hard he thinks he might have a concussion. After what seems like hours, they’re told to get their things and head outside. Excitement forms in the pit of Bellamy’s stomach as he imagines what it’s going to be like to be on the ground. When he breathes in the first bit of fresh air instead of the recycled air of the Ark, he knows this is going to be a good thing. 

He’s startled when a _car_ drives past them from the woods, stopping at the base of the dropship ramp. He recognizes the person that gets out of it though, and is moving before he knows what he’s doing. “Nate!” 

Miller turns around so fast he almost loses his footing, and grins when he sees Bellamy. The two men hug briefly, laughing. “Took you long enough.” 

“What the hell are you doing with this thing?” 

“We found it. Raven brought it back to life. We’re going to take a few trips, bring you guys to the settlement and get everyone’s gear over there too. There’s a lot we can salvage from the dropship.” 

Bellamy grins in wonderment. “Wow. I--” a noise at his side interrupts him, and he falters. “Oh! Sorry. Miller, this is my sister, Octavia. O, this is Nathan Miller.” 

“Hey, Octavia. Let’s get you guys loaded up.” 

“Wait.” Bellamy gets Miller’s attention before he walks away. “How-- I mean, is--”

“Clarke’s back at the settlement. She’ll be there when you arrive.” Miller says, with an absolutely shit-eating grin on his face. 

They manage to get about ten people loaded up into the rover, as Miller calls it, and then they’re off. It’s a little disorienting at first, but Bellamy is so wired he doesn’t think anything could stop the good mood he’s in right now. 

When they get there, Octavia looks at him like he’s losing his mind. “I can’t believe you’re this excited to see a girl.” 

“She’s not just a _girl_ , O.” 

“Right. She’s your wife.” 

Bellamy shakes his head, looking at the ground. “Well, yeah. But… I don’t know. She’s Clarke. She’s different.” 

“Don’t look now…” Miller says as he walks by, interrupting them. Something in the tone of his voice has Bellamy on high alert, and he lifts his head, shielding his eyes from the sun as he sees a small group of people heading towards them, the one at the head of the group catching his eye instantly.

She looks good. Different, but good. Her hair is curly, loose around her shoulders, and she looks more relaxed than he’s ever seen her. He can tell by the way the group follows her that she’s important here, and the thought of it causes pride to surge through him. 

“That’s her.” He tells Octavia, his voice a little breathless. He would be embarrassed if he wasn’t so damn happy to see her. 

When she gets closer, he can’t help it -- he takes a few steps forward, and when her eyes latch onto him, her smile grows until she’s running towards him, launching herself full-tilt into his arms. The feeling of her is incredible. 

“ _Bellamy_.” She says, and it sounds so reverent coming out of her mouth that he thinks he feels some tears pricking his eyes.

“I told you I’d see you soon.” He says, his voice hoarse. 

“You’re Octavia.” Clarke says, breaking their gaze as she turns to face his sister. “It’s really good to meet you.” 

“I can’t believe he talked you into marrying him just so he could come down here.” 

Clarke shrugs. “I went along with it, so I guess we’re both crazy.” 

Octavia narrows her eyes. “You’re not planning on dumping him now that we’re here, are you?” 

“Octavia.” Bellamy snaps, embarrassed.

“I’m planning on keeping him around for a little bit, unless I find someone more handsome.” Clarke jokes, shrugging. 

Bellamy smiles at her in disbelief, a laugh bubbling out of him. Clarke is so different here, so much _happier_ , and he finds himself desperate to get her alone, so they can catch up on what they’ve missed. 

“Come on. I’ve got a place for you both to stay.” 

“With you, right?” Bellamy blurts before he can think about it. 

“Yeah. With me.” Clarke says, smiling softly at him. 

“Good.” Bellamy nods at her, pleased when her cheeks flush pink. 

This isn’t going to be easy, he thinks as he looks around as they walk, at the half-finished homes and tents everywhere, at the general chaos of the place. He thinks he can do it, though, as long as he’s got his girls by his side. 

Suddenly, life is starting to look up.

_Hold on tight a little longer_

_What don't kill ya, makes ya stronger_

_Get back up, 'cause it's a hard love_

_You can't change without a fallout_

_It's gon' hurt, but don't you slow down_

_Get back up, 'cause it's a hard love_

**End**


End file.
